Why We Plan To Homeschool Our Children

When I tell people we plan to homeschool our children I always expect a bewildered reaction. I can understand that response, since homeschooling is one of those things most people don’t know much about unless you’re a homeschooler parent too or were homeschooled yourself. You don’t get taught about homeschooling in school, and sending your child to public school is such a normal thing to do, why question it? People consider homeschooling pretty unconventional, maybe strange. You might think it’s something that creates completely unsocialised, outcast, reclusive adults? Or a choice reserved for the religious nuts?

The truth is, homeschooling is on the rise with over 100,000 children being homeschooled in the Uk based on the 2024 census. Some parents choose it due to a general dissatisfaction with public schooling, others feel their child with special needs isn’t being adequately supported or to avoid issues such as bullying. Lifestyle, philosophical, cultural and religious beliefs also lead people to home educating. There’s a myriad of reasons, and many people got a taste of homeschool during the pandemic and decided to stick to it.

I can actually recall having a conversation with a friend at sixteen years old about the topic of homeschooling. I don’t remember how the subject came up. But I remember being intrigued, thinking it would be fun to plan my own educational field trips for my future children. I recall daydreaming about going out and exploring nature together as a family. Maybe I’ve always been a little unconventional, I often choose things that are against the grain.

I definitely didn’t always plan to homeschool and it was merely just a passing thought when I was young. As I got older I fully expected to do what everyone else does and I researched local schools when I was expecting my first child. But it was probably around then when the doubts started seeping in about sending my kids to school.

I considered what the local schools taught, I researched their ratings and ethics. There was a local Catholic primary school which I thought would be great for teaching moral values.. it looked like a wholesome, sweet little school whenever I walked past. But how could I send my Muslim children to a Christian school and risk them getting confused by the religious teachings? A Christian wouldn’t likely send their child to an Islamic school. If you truly feel strongly about your faith you wouldn’t want your child being educated in a place that doesn’t teach the same views. There’s no reputable Islamic schools near us, they’re few and far between in the Uk. Of course there’s secular schools holding no religious ethos with students of all faith backgrounds, but I want my children’s education to be centred in faith. God and His teachings should flow through it all, as I personally feel these lessons are the best way to shape good character.

No school seemed like the perfect fit. Slowly I started researching homeschool and my husband and I ultimately decided it would be right for our family. I initially was quite wary of how massive an undertaking and responsibility it would be for me. However quite quickly after discovering the wonderful online homeschooling community and diving deep into the internet rabbit hole of ‘how to homeschool’ I was hooked. There’s so many people sharing their homeschooling lives on YouTube, educating other parents on how it all works (theres endless different ways of homeschooling!). I was completely inspired by the incredible, loving, creative and devoted mothers, and fathers, doing what now seemed entirely natural, teaching and educating their own children.

The more I’ve learnt and dug deeper into the homeschooling world, the more I understand the unique benefits it offers and these are the biggest reasons we have for wanting to homeschool:

Faith development

As Muslims my husband and I feel strongly about our faith and want to encourage a strong connection to God from a young age for our children. With homeschooling we will be able to dedicate more time to teaching Islamic values and expend less energy combatting what is taught in schools, which often opposes our beliefs. More time as a family will allow us as parents to portray a strong example of living out our faith too!

We will be able to draw connections which will have otherwise been missed in school, pointing our children towards evidence of Gods fingerprints in the world, whether that be on a nature walk or while studying history or science. We don’t believe religion should be taught merely as a separate subject since Islam is our whole reality, it encompasses everything, flowing across all facets of our lives. Teaching faith without integrating our knowledge of its principles across all subjects makes it more likely to be seen as just another story or fairytale, I believe. As a revert to Islam only coming into religion in my early twenties, I pray that my children are grounded with an unshakable faith in God from as long as they can remember.

More family time

The thought of sending my children to school for 6-8 hours a day, everyday, until they reach adulthood really breaks my heart. Weekends and holidays just aren’t enough. Time is a thief, and they already grow up so fast despite me spending my entire days with them as a stay at home mother. Losing such a large portion of their childhood isn’t something that sits right with me, if there’s another way.

Homeschooling will offer the flexibility to play, learn and explore together and most importantly it gives the gift of time. The homeschooling dynamic of one-to one teaching allows schoolwork to be completed much quicker, allowing more time for hobbies and interests.

Stronger family relationships

Unlike with public school where such a large portion of the day is spent apart from your children, with homeschooling you are inescapably spending much more time together. I remember as a child sometimes feeling like two different people at home and at school and I think that’s quite normal in today’s age. I was spending so much time with classmates and coming home withered and tired, maybe in a bad mood. I was experiencing so much throughout the day that my parents had no knowledge of, sometimes difficult things, all without their direct support. I think that separation can create a certain distance from your parents, maybe it’s called independence. I don’t want my children to be pushed towards independence at a young age and to ever think ‘my parents just won’t understand’.

With homeschooling, I will be there to nurture and support my children all the time. I expect it to be challenging, children like to test the people they love the most and like to push our buttons, but learning to understand each-other through those daily interactions, the good and the bad times, masks off, is what I hope will lead to strong bonds between us, and strong sibling relationships.

Homeschooling also involves families learning and exploring subjects together, and that’s the key! It’s a huge commitment and devotion, not just help with homework when the child gets home from school. It is a constant learning lifestyle together. You are engaging in practical activities, problem solving together, embarking on field trips and having fun discussions that align with your child’s interests and values. It can only strengthen a family’s relationship when there’s such an intimate involvement in the children’s education, and I hope our children will feel understood and empowered to explore their passions, whatever they turn out be.

Safety

The more I think about it, the weirder it seems to send your children off to nursery or enrol them in school, entrusting their care to a group of strangers. As parents we never get to meet, get to know or vet out every single teacher or member of staff within a school. A few lines of polite small talk at school pick up or a discussion of my child’s progress at parents evening does not constitute the level of relationship I need with someone to hand over my child. Them having qualifications tells me nothing of their personal character and values. Our children are the most precious things in the world to us, why is it normal to have them cared for by people we don’t really know?

We have all heard stories of children falling victim to abuse at the hands of teachers or carers and no matter how rare, that isn’t something I’m prepared to risk.

Protection from harmful influences

Having more control over who my child makes friends with and the adults they interact with during the day, may seem a little too obsessive. But speaking from our own religious standpoint, we believe there’s a lot of harmful ideologies in today’s society that have the potential to negatively impact our children. There are certain topics taught in schools that don’t align with our beliefs, the prevailance and the normalising of LGBTQ values is a big concern to us.

The possibility of our children encountering drugs, gangs, bullies, kids who are technology obsessed (more damaging than it may seem), it’s all left completely to chance when children are sent to school. Totally out of the parents hands. It is very important to us to protect our children when they are still so young, vulnerable, and easily influenced.

But dealing with bullying ‘builds strength and character’ people say. I disagree. It has the potential to wreck your child’s self esteem before they’ve built strong enough personal confidence. It can make you feel unsafe, anxious and unable to focus on your education and learning at all, at a time when you’re not emotionally mature enough to handle it. It could be a detriment to their entire education, how unfortunate it might be if a child was unable to fulfil their potential due to some nasty bullies.

I want my kids to grow up in safety and security with a loving support system, filled with positive role models and good influences. This will enable them to develop into strong and confident adults who can deal with whatever comes their way. Children grow up, they flee the nest and we can’t protect them forever, they’ll see and experience the world eventually for themselves. But atleast at that point they will be mature, self confident and strong in their convictions, allowing them to make good choices.

Cultivate a learning lifestyle

It’s common to be bombarded with hefty textbooks in school, not that inspiring! We want to cultivate a love of learning for our children that lasts a lifetime, not a race to complete exams and finish learning. The crucial element we believe, is the way in which we are presented with information. There are many different education approaches popular within the homeschool world, Charlotte Mason and Waldorf are two that resonate with me, with learning centred on nature, real life skills, and bringing wonder into academics instead of dry textbooks.

Charlotte Mason, a British educator and reformer wrote that “information is not education,” meaning that dry facts and dull ideas from textbooks and other sources are not the seeds from which a true education is grown. However, if we present a wide feast of living ideas (artwork, stories, books that make the subject come alive) to educate our children, we can show them how the world is a wonderfully interesting place worthy of learning about.

“Why in the world should we not give children, while they are at school, the sort of books they can live upon; books alive with thought and feeling, and delight in knowledge, instead of the miserable cram-books on which they are starved?”

-Charlotte Mason, Formation of Character, p. 291

For example, she taught handwriting and spelling by using passages from great books that communicate great ideas rather than using just a list of words.

The main emphasis with Charlotte Mason’s approach is on inspiring children, whether that be through nature journaling, scientific conversations, practical hands on activities, museum trips or beautifully illustrated books.

I am looking forward to integrating principles of different educational approaches I feel will ignite a passion for learning in our children. When learning is enjoyable, it doesn’t feel like work, it can be something we choose to do any time of day. And with homeschooling, the whole family takes part, so we can cultivate an atmosphere and lifestyle of learning with those around us.

Having an active roll in my child’s education

I view providing an education to your child as an extension of parenting, it’s not as complex as people often make it sound. We teach our babies to walk, talk, to hold a spoon and to put on their shoes. If you’re a reasonably educated person, continuing that practice of helping your child develop across different subjects is entirely possible. Of course thousands of homeschooling families are out there doing it! As a stay at home mother with GCSE’s, A-levels and a degree, I feel I have the time and the ability to take on the main responsibility.

In a child’s early years of homeschool, parent and child embark on a learning journey together. We can all teach the basics, colours, numbers, animal names, then gradually you begin learning alongside your child.

As children grow and you approach high school years they become increasingly more independent learners. As parents you’ll never be a complete expert in everything, but we can easily become good researchers, provide resources and be facilitators to an older child’s more self directed approach to education. Nobody is asking homeschool parents to teach degree level Math. But if anyone has a thirst for learning, I believe they can comprehend pretty much anything.

I experience such joy when my little girl ever learns something from me, a word or phrase we’ve practiced and practiced and it fills my heart with pride when she finally gets it. It’s a beautiful and fulfilling moment. I would like to continue to support and encourage my children further into education, so I can be there for all those achievements, big and small. I don’t believe any teacher would ever be as devoted and committed to my children’s learning and comprehension than me!

You don’t have to follow the national curriculum

One great advantage to homeschooling is that there’s no pressure to follow the national curriculum. There’s an abundance of different curriculums available, or you can create your own (not as completely impossible as it first sounds!) The English national ciriculum has been described as ‘extremely narrow’ with ‘mountains of detail for English, maths and science, leaving little space for other learning.’ Furthermore, it has also been criticised for its ‘endless lists of spellings, facts and rules, demanding too much too young, putting pressure on teachers to rely on rote learning without understanding.’

You can always use the national curriculum as a guide, but there’s so much more out there. There are infinite things you can choose to learn about, many things that might have more relevance to your family that you’d like to cover in homeschool once you have covered the basics. Have you ever come across an interesting topic that you never covered in school, but wish you had? Something personal to your heritage, a passion you’ve developed as an adult, or a niche subject? There’s fascinating subjects out there, Empires of the Sea (Christian-Muslim conflict in the Mediterranean in the 1500s) popped up to me recently, saving that one for future years!

For better socialisation and academic performance

Contrary to popular belief, there’s actually no evidence to suggest that homeschooled individuals have reduced social skills, or that traditional schooling leads to better social skills.

Richard G. Medlin of Stetson University notes that “Compared to children attending conventional schools, however, research suggests that homeschooled students have higher quality friendships and better relationships with their parents and other adults.” (source and source)

Homeschoolers develop social skills with increased time with their families, and enjoy the flexibility to be able to attend groups, clubs, classes and events with other children, anytime, anywhere.

In addition, homeschoolers are even more skilled at having conversations with people of different age groups and making new friends with their public-schooled counterparts, who are usually only with other kids that happened to be born within 12 months of their birthdays.

Also, the home-educated typically score 15 to 25 percentile points above public-school students on standardized academic achievement tests (Ray, 2010, 2015, 2017; Ray & Hoelzle, 2024).

To conclude ..

Although I feel homeschooling makes most logical sense to me, I don’t think it is for everyone, as not everyone is in the position to be able to offer that much time and support to a child. I think it works best when one parent stays home and you’re able to manage a one income household, or if parents already work from home. A privilege not everyone gets to experience with ease today.

My children are almost 2, and 2 months old, so I have a good couple of years ahead yet before providing a full time education is even compulsory (term after 5th birthday). However, taking time to consider whats right for our family and questioning the traditional schooling route ahead of time has opened my eyes to the numerous benefits homeschooling could offer. I have now got time to plan, collect ideas and resources, and to delve deeper into the fascinating educational approaches out there which I think will foster a beautiful love of learning. Equipping myself for the challenge has become an enjoyable hobby in itself lately! Ultimately, homeschooling is a choice my husband and I are really certain of, an adventure I’m really excited to take with my children, and a journey I hope God will bless us on.

May peace be upon you,

An English Muslim Homemaker